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Kobozev, Anton
Written by ,   
, 01 2002

Age 28; Russia, Moscow.

Born on March 14th, 1974, the oldest son in a large family. Hewas a graduate of the October Revolution Music School and Gnesiniy Institute, and worked for the New Opera Theater. Healso had a directing degree from the Ural Conservatory. Married for but two years, he had a 13month-old son named Vladislav.

Our parents had known each other for many years. Mymother and father knew Anton since he was fifteen. Wegot to know each other three years ago, while Iwas still in high school. Hewas nine years my senior. Ayear later, on November 12th, 2000, we got married. Wewere together for but two years, such a short while Vladik was born on October 1st of 2001, and Anton was so happy to have a son. Wewanted more children, since Iwas also the oldest child in my family, with six sisters and a brother.

I was rocking the baby when it all began, and no one told me about it. Mysister Natasha had been watching television and ran to tell my parents that the Nord-Ost play had been taken hostage. Theydecided not to tell me about it. Ihad tried to call Anton, but he would not answer the phone. About ten oclock he called me. Athalf-past ten Iwent to my parents place, and my youngest sister Olechka said: Poor Anton, poor Anton Icould not understand why was he poor? Hecalled me up, asked us to pray he said that it would be okay, but that was nonsense. Hetried to calm us down, so that we did not worry so much. Hecalled several times. Whenhe called on Thursday night his voice was very low Idid not know if someone was standing over him with a machinegun, or if he was feeling bad. At5 in the morning on Friday he called, and he sounded very cheerful. Hetold Mother that they were going to blow up the theater tomorrow, and asked for the priests telephone number. Mother called me to the phone, and he told me: Liz, dont worry, its a long time off.

When he left home the last time, Ithought: what if it is the last time Iever see him? Iwalked him to the door, watched him from the window, called him on the cell phone and said: I love you. And he told me: I love you. And all this while Icould still see him through the window, and see that he was talking withme.

Anton was a very kind and sympathetic man. Everyone got along with him. Welived with my parents for awhile, like one big family, and my parents treated him like their own son. Atthe wedding, his friend asked him how he would be able to stand it, since he too had experienced something similar. Anton told him: You know, Im used to getting along with people. We had no conflicts, just little things. Heloved little Vladik so much. Onthat last day, he had the morning off and they played together. Thenight before, Vladik had said Papa onetime.

Anton did not have full-time work at Nord-Ost, but was a replacement for the flute-player who went on tour with a show in Italy. Sheeven asked him to go in her stead, since the working conditions at Nord-Ost were better, but Anton did not want to be away from home for a whole month. Hedid not say that he would not go, he just let it be, and so it turned out that she left and he went to work at Nord-Ost each day. Hehad asked for the day off, and the theater agreed, but Anton could not get ahold of the other flute-player the night before, so he went to work anyway.

A girl who was there told me that Anton was numb from all the events, and they tried to raise his spirits, called out to him, but he would not even turn his head. Itwas as if he had lost his will to live!! Itwas strange he was deep in prayer, asking that his life be spared, but most of all, that his soul be saved! Whatthey said about him losing his will to live, Iwill never believe that, because he was cheerful when he called me up, he wanted to remain about the living.

Anton had an asthma-like allergy. Hecould not undergo general anesthesia, and this gas, from what Iunderstand of it, is a kind of general anesthestic. Twogirls who were seated next to him both survived. Allof this has only strengthened my faith, but Iwould still like to know what went on, and from what it was that he died. There needs to be discussion on this. People need to know, society needs to know what really went on, because there is just too much speculation and lies. People should know as much as possible.

I now know that the crossing from one world to the next is very close Andno one knows when it will happen to him. Anton is dead, but Icannot say that Ihave no husband. Ihave a husband, and Ilove him. Ifeel his presense all thetime.

Filarmonik #4, 2002

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Comments (3)
1. Written by , on 19-10-201221:01

2. Written by , on 23-10-201211:46
, , . . .

3. Written by , on 09-12-201515:50
2003 : http://photo.qip.ru/users/taras/9322/

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